Tuesday, September 16, 2008

random thoughts at work 9-17-08

this a new experiment im going to try.
im going to leave this open all day. and jot down all the random thoughts that float into my head throughout the day.
hopefully by the time i finish there will be something resembling a neat idea.

8:31am
when i was in youth group, i was kind of sold this idea that as soon as you figured out how to be a good christian, you'd experience this thing called "sanctification" which was pitched to me and my com-padres as the process of getting all the junk out of your life so that you wouldn't have any more problems. This process would take at the most a couple years and you would come out smelling like new enthusiasm.
about 8 years into this, i don't think the end of this whole sanctification thing is any where near being completed. In fact i think that its actually gotten harder.
In youth group its easy to hide behind unneeded drama from other people, or hide behind your parents or even your age, but as a young adult, you have little-to-no excuses when it comes to the junk in your life.
lack of faith, selfish ambition, pride that basically says "im smarter than God" and all the usual sins you struggled with in high school.
AND
the things that once made you completely happy now seem so very useless.
but then there are these times. so very random times. they come and they bring this kind of contentment that serve as a kind of re-charging for me. It kind of serves to say, hey, it really is worth everything you put in.

10:24am
people need to not be so rude to the people that serve them their food.
you never know what kind of "dressing" or "garnish" you might get once you've chewed them out about the quality of the cereal we have.
:D

11:40am
people complain
alot
and that might very well be the original nature of blogging (which might make this paragraph a lil bit of my hypocrisy)
this guy comes in an is just not happy with anything. the color on the walls, the bitterness/sweetness of the coffee, my total lack to fall at his feet in servant-hood, everything.
now this man has both legs. both arms. no physical ailments. He has on a tie with nice shoes.
he has a voice to talk with and ears to lisen, eyes to see and a mind to think
he also has money to buy an expensive latte with.
so why such a sour attitude?

2pm
almost done here.
and now im starting to get tired and home is looking all the more better.
i wonder if when your dying. you get this feeling only x1 million.
home. finally. now i can rest.

2:59pm
im outie 5000
later!

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

better late than never or everyone else is doing it so why the heck not.

well i think the last time i updated this thing was like before the summer.
sooooooo
we went to padre
-it was awesome
i took summer school
-not so awesome
best summer that i can remember
-yes
school started
-pretty gay
people going away. ie: Africa/Uruguay/Dallas
-also (but much more) gay
but all in all i think i can say that this summer will forever be "the good ol' days" from here on out
the good ol days were awesome
now that the real world has come and gave way to the days shortly after "the good ol' days" i think its alot easier that i had previously thought.
Jessica went to south america to study down there.
so far shes having an amazing time, except a minor bump on the head(literally)
but before that Clayton hopped a plane to South Africa to spread the gospel to people who may not live to see tomorrow. I am extremely glad that he is there doing the work he's doing. What a better way to fulfill God's call than to actually do it.
Then katie and kaitlin packed their cars full and headed back to the DevilBaptistUniveristy. Oh sorry DALLAS Baptist University. :D. Silly me.
While me and michael hanging back in funky town to learn greek and the bible and such.
With everyone in their respective places we started school (and some started to subsequently die of over-schooling) and started to live life as normal as one can with a packed schedule.
I myself started working over 30 hours a week while taking only 6 hours of school, the latter will hopefully pay for the former. While i hate not taking as many hours. its literally the only debt free way i can pay for school, so i resolved to work god-awful early hours and later night than normal.
all the working has kind of kept me from deep thinking
which may or may not be a bad thing, but it still deprives you of some kind of morality or spiritual lesson in this specific encounter. (which also may or may not be a good thing)

final thought
summer was amazing
school is obligatory but rewarding
while i miss my friends. i am so happy that they each are where God wants them to be, doing what God wants them to be doing. and to be mad at that is kind of like challenging Elijah to a cook off. if you get my drift.
but day by day im starting to realize all these pockets of pride and selfishness in my life, and while purging said pockets does not produce a happy steven, it produces a better, more Christ-like steven. and if this school year only does that, its going to be a good school year.

adiĆ³s good fellow ;